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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981697">Who the hell is Rocky Horror?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForgingOurDestiny/pseuds/ForgingOurDestiny'>ForgingOurDestiny</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stories inspired by my family [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Attempt at Humor, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Established Relationship, M/M, Merlin likes Rocky Horror, Rocky Horror Picture Show References, Sort Of</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:55:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,068</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981697</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForgingOurDestiny/pseuds/ForgingOurDestiny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>As with most problems in Arthur’s life, this was all Gwaine’s fault. After a night of (rather heavy) drinking with the former Knights of the Round Table, Gwaine had kept going on about how Merlin had, at some point, had a huge crush on some guy called “Rocky Horror”.</p><p>~*~</p><p>Arthur is confused about who the hell Rocky Horror is and it leads him down a weird rabbit hole.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stories inspired by my family [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2251551</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Who the hell is Rocky Horror?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So, I watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show last night with my family, and apparently mouthing "What the fuck?" at my sister throughout the duration wasn't enough, so this is my way of releasing all of the confusion I felt at that perfect nightmare of a film. I hope you all enjoy me channeling my frustrations through Arthur. :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As with most problems in Arthur’s life, this was all Gwaine’s fault. After a night of (rather heavy) drinking with the former Knights of the Round Table, Gwaine had kept going on about how Merlin had, at some point, had a huge crush on some guy called “Rocky Horror”.</p><p> </p><p>It was just Gwaine’s usual drunken ramblings, as far as Arthur was aware, but just to be sure nothing would come of this old crush, Arthur decided to google the name. And that was how, one Saturday night, when Merlin was out drinking with some friends of his from work, Arthur watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show…</p><p> </p><p>~*~</p><p> </p><p>There was really nothing Arthur could do but blink at the credits and wonder <em>‘What the in the fresh hell was that?’</em> It certainly hadn’t been what he was expecting, although maybe the cover of the DVD case he had found should have been some kind of clue as to what he was letting himself in for.</p><p> </p><p>It had started off well enough, with a wedding. Who doesn’t love a wedding? Then the first song started, and Arthur figured he really should have known that Merlin was a musicals sort of man. It would have been fine if it went the way Arthur had thought it would, but it took a left turn from wholesome into downright <em>‘what-the-fuck’</em> territory.</p><p> </p><p>There were songs that made no sense, peculiarly dressed characters, a man in high heels and a corset (which looked in no way comfortable), people being stripped down to their underwear, giving life to muscly creations, a man on a motorbike riding out of a huge freezer room, a ‘mercy killing’ (read: murder) that was casually glossed over, a consummation with a creation, possible incest, infidelity, loss of virginity, a man in golden shorts and nothing else being chased by dogs, voyeurism, more infidelity, jealousy, a new arrival, a birthday party, cannibalism, a chase, people turning into statues, a cabaret show, a swimming pool orgy, aliens, more casual murder, and a house being beamed back to wherever the hell it came from, all being narrated by a criminologist reading from a report. And Merlin liked this shit?</p><p> </p><p>Arthur was still in a daze when Merlin arrived home, a little worse for wear, but apparently immortality gives you one hell of an alcohol tolerance. He flounced into their living room, flopped on the sofa next to Arthur, curled up to his chest, and finally registered the look of complete disbelief that was being shot at him.</p><p> </p><p>“What?”</p><p> </p><p>“What the hell did I just watch?” Was the mumbled reply he received. Merlin was fairly certain it had been a rhetorical question but looked to the tv screen to see if he could find the answer anyway.</p><p> </p><p>The credits had finished and had returned to the main menu, and once Merlin registered what was on the screen, it seemed that the only appropriate reaction was to laugh, and so laugh he did.</p><p> </p><p>As it turns out, Merlin’s laughter snapped Arthur back to awareness, triggering a barrage of questions, mostly along the lines of, “Seriously Merlin, what the hell did I just watch? There was- there was weird science, and- and songs, and the costumes were- and underwear- and he was chained to the bed- and- and aliens- and- and- … what?”</p><p> </p><p>During Arthur’s little crisis in which he questioned the purpose and morals of humanity, as well as their intentions with the world, Merlin managed to calm himself enough to be breathing again, which was quite a feat in and of itself.</p><p> </p><p>Arthur still had the look of a confused and startled puppy on his face, and so Merlin thought he should try to ‘help’.</p><p> </p><p>“You know, the first time I saw this was in the ‘80’s. I was out with a group of lads in Dublin; we got drunk and decided it’d be a laugh to go in and watch it… it made perfect sense. So much sense, in fact, that I went back to watch it the following Friday night.”</p><p> </p><p>The look on Arthur’s face could best be described as that of the parent whose child has just done copious amounts of crack cocaine and then proceeds to recite the works of Shakespeare perfectly. That is to say, he was a peculiar mix of horrified, astonished, awed, wary, and flabbergasted.</p><p> </p><p>“That… that <em>fever dream</em> made sense while you were <em>drunk</em>?!”</p><p> </p><p>“I think it’s probably the best way <em>to</em> watch it. We should try it that way next time! Then we can do all of the interactive bits, like throwing toilet rolls when he says, “Great Scott!” and getting noisemakers for when Rocky comes alive. Oh, oh, we’ll make a viewing party out of it! I’m sure Morgana would love it, and Lance might even have a stroke!”</p><p> </p><p>While Merlin babbled merrily to himself, Arthur’s head was spinning. How could that <em>nightmare</em> possibly make sense <em>drunk?!</em> Arthur had been sober watching it and half the time he was completely lost as to what was happening, trying to follow some kind of coherent plot seemed impossible. Maybe being drunk on further viewings <em>would</em> help… And if they didn’t, he could use the alcohol as an excuse to fall asleep halfway through and not have to worry about it making sense anyway…</p><p> </p><p>“I went to a couple of viewings in London, they were sing-along ones, where the whole audience participated in those weird little traditions. Some people even came dressed up as the characters, in little gold shorts, or corsets, fishnets, and high heels. Some of those guys really pulled it off, although they must have been freezing their ba-“ As Merlin kept prattling on, Arthur decided to go to bed in hopes of escaping the bad acid trip he had just watched, Merlin’s voice following him up the stairs.</p><p> </p><p>~*~</p><p> </p><p>Life went on but every year, without fail, Merlin would try and convince Arthur to be Rocky Horror for Hallowe’en. One year Arthur had had enough, and replied that if Merlin wanted him to be Rocky, he would have to be Dr. Frank-N-Furter. Thirty minutes later, Arthur was staring down Merlin dressed in ripped fishnet tights, black panties and a corset, platform heels, and exaggerated make-up. That was the one and only year he made an appearance as Rocky Horror in public, but it turns out that Merlin had a thing for buff, blond men in golden shorts.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Shout out to my dad, who first watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show while drunk (apparently it made perfect sense), and my uncle who supposedly dressed as Dr. Frank-N-Furter to public sing-alongs.</p><p>Comments are a balm to my soul, and make me smile, so please tell me if you enjoyed!</p><p>I hope you enjoyed this plotless, meaningless mess! TTFN, ta ta for now!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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